There's a time and a place

Photo credit: Coldplay Live 2012

I went to see Coldplay in Brisbane last Wednesday night - what an amazing show! There were lights, fireworks, enormous balloons bouncing over the audience, somewhere in the vicinity of 52 000 people, laser beams, and of course, an incredible band on stage. In the first 10 minutes the enigmatic Chris Martin had managed to say what kids tell me is the 'f-word' about six times.

Did I mind? Hell, no! It was entirely appropriate given the spectacle, the noise, the excitement, the sheer awesomeness (another word we love using these days) of it all.

Swearing appears to be such a part of our vernacular these days. We hear it everywhere - at the movies, on TV, in newspapers, at the shops, and dare I say it - in our own homes. It seems everyone swears these days. I even do my own fair share of swearing! So it makes it quite difficult when we want to stop children swearing at school. We tell them it's wrong and even discipline the continual offenders. Is school the only place where swearing is not allowed? No, of course not! There are many situations in which swearing is completely out of place, and may even be offensive.

Kids swear for many reasons - for effect, to impress their peers, to try out an 'adult' vernacular, as a habit, to assert themselves in the peer group - and while I don't mind listening to Chris Martin swear in between songs, I hate hearing kids swear. I hate hearing my own child swear (even though she insists that now she is 18 she can say what she likes!). Perhaps that's the key - they feel grown up when they can legitimately let fly with a few 'f-words'.

Our roles as parents and educators is to teach about time and place so that swearing becomes a mature choice between expressing yourself intelligently and respectfully or taking a shortcut with a few offensive words. Choosing to swear isn't about a rite of passage - it's about choosing behaviour that demonstrates how you want to seen. This is a useful skill for our children to learn - and maturity is demonstrated through its use.